thoughts of a missionary on the island of Guam

Saturday, May 14, 2011

the end.

What a day. I've been solemn since this morning. I'm finding myself at a transitional position. It seems I'm almost always here. Changing from one thing to the next. Sometimes I yearn for a more steady and peaceful way of life, other times I thrive in the adventure of it all. The fact that I'm so contradictory in my feelings, to my dismay, is further proof that I'm one flawed individual. I thank God, for using me anyhow. :)

It is said that the end of a thing is better than its beginning. Well it's the end of another school year at my family's school on the island of Guam (est. 2008). If you'd ever watched the Lord of the Rings trilogy (yes, I'm into it) you would remember the incredibly lengthy ending of the final film. Frodo has just been on this incredible journey, facing the greatest evil imaginable, and saving all of Middle Earth from it. He is FINALLY able to return to his beloved Shire, the only home he's really known, yet it somehow doesn't feel like home anymore. He looks so aged and worn from his experiences. Now, I'm not saying that this school year can really compare to all of that (despite some challenging times- haha!), but it seems that some experiences age you on the inside, just like that.

I feel like I've grown so much and that I'm not the same person I was, even just a year ago. I've been humbled. I realize now that I know nothing, except the truths we see in God's written word, the Bible, of course. Yes, some speculation is enough to drive one crazy. Only God can discern thoughts and intents of the hearts of men and I think I'll leave that job to Him. He knows what to do with that information anyway.

At the end of a big adventure, a life-changing experience, there are always mixed emotions. I guess, in the midst of all the crazy transitions going on right now (the school moving to a new location, the family moving into the new school location, and trying to figure out where I fit in the mix of things this next school year), I'm searching for some kind of security to clutch onto. I found it tonight, in Christ. He's been my faithful friend. How do I know He cares personally about me? Not only is Psalm 139 so assuring of the fact, but I know because He has answered prayers I've only dared whisper in my heart. He's given me a peace that surpasses understanding. He's been good to those I love. He's been good to me.

I thank the Lord for a good year. I thank Him for using my family to doing something so cool; to be a part of His kingdom, and share in the honor of building it. Lord help us.

Friday, February 25, 2011

you've got one shot

"You've only got one shot to live this life," I told myself this morning. Now 22 may sound young to you, but not to me. "Time flies," older people have said. Oh, it's true. The days are passing by more quickly than I can keep up with.

We just got cable in our house, much to my dismay, with the exception of access to T.C.M. (Turner Classic Movies- oh yeah!). I haven't watched hardly any T.V. for years now. Last night I had a home alone to catch up on what's on the tube. Boy, and what I've been missing out on! Ai adai. Anyhoo, The Last Holiday was on. A movie about a woman who has been responsible all her life, saved and invested her monies, and always taken the safe and secure route. She finds out that she has two weeks to live, and on that news, she has a good cry and then decides to take all of her money and live it up before she has to go. Later in the movie, after she's lived the adventurous lifestyle she had always been afraid to live, there's a point in which she looks in the mirror and says to herself that next go around, things are going to be different, that she's going to live more like she had been those two weeks.

Well, it got me to thinking, that I have but one life to live on this earth. After I die, or the Lord comes back first, things won't be the same down here at all. I've only got one shot at this situation. I'd hate to make it to the end of my course here and wonder what I did for the Lord; what I did that was of worth. Even now I look back and I can see time in my life wasted on frivolous things. I desperately want to hear a "job well done, my faithful daughter." That would be rapturous.

No Reserves
No Retreat
No Regrets
                                 -William Borden

Thursday, January 1, 2009

leap, says he

Tomorrow I head to the place I spent the first half of the school year to teach an all new class of little minds with big thoughts. I am so amazed at how open and receptive children are- how they rely on you for so much. They will do something, right or wrong, and then turn to read your face- will your affirm or correct what they've just done? They rely on you for their basic needs- food, health, teaching, loving, correcting, etc. What a lot of trust they put in you- it's almost complete.

I'm reminded of the time when I was a little girl trying to learn how to ride a bike with the help of my Dad. How much comfort I had when he held on to the bike seat as I peddled. I felt I wouldn't fall, that I was safe. But as soon as I felt him let go I would yell out in fear, "Daddy!"

How brave we can be when we know that someone is holding on to the bicycle seat. I heard an analogy of trapeze artists that really put things in perspective for me. When considering a trapeze artist, would he do such stunts if he didn't have a safety net? No, he would be more cautious. But knowing that there's a safety net beneath him enables him to try all kinds of amazing stunts! I think that's what God has been trying to tell me, but like some of my students, I can be hard of hearing. He tells me, "Leap my dear, I will catch you should you fall. Don't be afraid."

I'm glad I have a patient Teacher :)


Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him, and He will help you. He will make your innocence radiate like the dawn, and the justice of your cause will shine like the noonday sun.

Psalm 37:5-6

Saturday, November 15, 2008

fly against the wind

The world says:

"Get it all now!"

The Body of Christ says:

"Give it all now, get it all later."

Monday, November 3, 2008

Almost Speechless

So today I found myself feeling pretty down, as it was officially my last day at the school. I did not for a moment expect a surprise "going away party" to be given in my honor! Around lunch time, I was obviously being stalled and was not allowed to go outside into the breezeway. When finally permitted to go, I found the kindergarten and 1st Grade students, along with all the teachers, waiting for me! The Kindergarten students had made an adorable banner decorated with hearts, hands, and sweet messages. My 1st Grade class came running at me with cards they made, and then I was given a bag of goodies from my co-laborers and treated with a delicious lunch! Aww!

And that's not all! This afternoon I received, not one, but two packages with my name on them! In the first I opened, I found colorful real Fall leaves, accompanied with some pictures of the beautiful Georgia mountains in fiery colors (the answer to a promise by a dear).

The other, I found a box full of some of my favorite things and notes from dear friends! Wow, how encouraging! So much goodness in one day, what can I say? I am a girl truly blessed :)

So thankful,


Sunday, November 2, 2008

as the curtain closes

My time serving as a 1st Grade teacher comes to an end, and I find it hard to put into words all that I've learned.

Before being offered the position, I had been praying for an opportunity to work with children, as I haven't had much experience with kids in general. Wow! Did the Lord answer my prayer. About a month after arriving on Guam, I was offered the position of a "Learning to Read" supervisor, which means that I would teach a special segment of the students' 1st Grade year focusing primarily on learning to read. It's been 3 months, and now the program has ended, and my focus is to be shifted completely to my parents' school and my own individual studies.


  • "Mom- I mean oops! Hehe! Why do we keep calling you mom?" - Student, E.C. "Because you're good to us?" -Student, S.O. (How sweet is this!)
  • "I love you!" -Student, D.N.
  • "You read a word!" -Me
  • "You're a good teacher." -Student, S.O.
  • "Teacher, you look pretty." 3-year-old, N.LG.

  • My students surrounding and literally sniffing me while I giggle and try to escape the mob
  • Carpooling with Ms. Esther while jammin' to Kirk Franklin on the way to and from work
  • The shyest girl in class, out of the blue, tackling me with a hug
  • Eating lunch one-on-one with each of my students
  • Playing "explorers" outside
  • S.H. drawing a picture of a heart, pointing to it, then to E.C, then E.C. pointing and telling on him, saying, "Teacher! He loves me!"
  • S.H. catching bugs and lizards almost at every recess!
  • Field trip to the bowling alley on Base
  • D.N. praying to receive the Lord as his personal Savior

  • Lessons:

    • Kids have a pure sense of justice and will hold you to your word
    • Kids remember almost everything
    • When working with little ones, patience is not only a virtue, it's a necessity!
    • Plan, plan, plan ahead!
    • Don't be afraid to improvise :)
    • Be flexible
    • Persevere
    • Pray
    • Love!
    What a beautiful chapter that has now closed!


    Sunday, October 26, 2008

    Absentee Voting by E-mail

    I'm amazed that it's possible!


    So, this didn't work, and i'm too late :( :( :(